Max Timchak lives in Oak Park, Illinois. He is five years old and likes jokes. The following Q&A was conducted by Matthea Harvey in December 2011 in Fond du Lac, Wisconsin.
Why was the elephant in the pocket?
Because it was a baby.
Why was the freckle on the sidewalk?
Because it got stuck.
Why did the pancake cross the road?
Because it had feet.
Why is hair always grey?
Because they're pumas.
Why do shirts look so plain?
Because the people, they're hopeless.
Why did the yoghurt never pour out?
Because it was hopeless.
Why do pictures go to the zoo?
Because they're happy.
Why do beer bottles never pour out champagne?
Because a mouse drank all of it.
Why do alligators never wear sweatshirts?
Because they have rectangle bodies.
Why was the shoe on the car?
Because it didn't have shoelaces.
Why do strawberries eat meat?
Because they're meat-eaters.
Why do kangaroos like carrots?
Because they have noses.
Why did the muffin talk to the coffee?
Because the raisins like talking.
Why was the house wearing jeans?
Because it had legs.
Why don't we have teeth on our knees?
So we don't get hurt.
Why did the lady pack bacon in her suitcase?
Because the lady liked the food called bacon.
Why don't numbers count?
Because they're icecream.
Why did the pony fly into the cloud?
Because it had rainshields.
Why does icecream melt in the freezer?
Because it's dead.
Why do eyeballs don't talk?
Because they're icicles.
Why did the lady eat her hand?
Because she liked meat.
Why did the napkin go to the supermarket?
Because it loves donuts.
Why are blankets not cuddly?
Because they're hair for girls.
Why aren't pillows comfy?
Because they're rocks.
[Note from Matthea—Max's explanation for why he always knew the answers to my jokes: "I know your memory and I looked in your diary."]